More Than Words...

16 days ago, something unexpected happened to my family...something I hoped wouldn't arrive too soon - my father-in-law had a massive heart attack, and he died in the emergency room of the hospital we brought him to. Even with everything that's happening at that time, we were all still hopeful that he would survive his heart attack, because he was conscious and all that. Just a few minutes after we all sat down outside the ER, we were surprised by the sight of my father-in-law being resuscitated by the doctors and nurses. A few more minutes after that, the doctor informed my mother-in-law that his heart is not responding anymore, and that was when she decided to let go. Tears followed after that. Dad's gone.

If I was to describe my father-in-law in a few words...that's exactly what I'll say - he's a man of few words. In the 12 years that we lived under one roof, we never really talked for long periods of time. So, everything I know about him were either gotten from my husband's stories or my own observation. But regardless of whether he spoke to me a lot or not, he was still good to me in many ways, even (and especially) to my children.

Like I said, Dad was a man of few words, but let me tell you when he would give us a bit of scolding - whenever he sees or feels that we are not taking good care of our kids, specifically with their health. You see, years of caring for our boys gave us this parental instinct that help us predict whether or not their illness need the attention of doctors or not, and that's something my father-in-law didn't like. Because of Dad's great concern for his grandchildren, he wanted us to always bring our kids to their pediatrician as soon as an illness starts to develop. Even with this difference of opinion, I couldn't get mad. Instead, I was grateful that aside from us, someone cared as much as we do for our kids.

Although my husband and I got married when we weren't financially stable yet, beginning a family wasn't hard, all because of Dad. He made one of the most difficult phase in a person's life an easy one. He paid for pre-natal check-ups, our hospital bills, our baby's monthly check-up and vaccines, and I never once heard him complain about it to our faces. He may have shared his sentiments about this to other people, but never to us. I hear other married folks complaining about their parents-in-law, I am fortunate to be not one of them. People like Dad are rare, and I was lucky to have crossed path with him in my lifetime.

I cried so hard when Dad passed away. Until today, tears still well up in my eyes when the thought of not seeing him anymore enters my mind. We survive each day without him because we imagine he's just out somewhere playing cards (tong-its) with his friends. When reality sets in, though, we get sad again. I cry because he was taken from us too soon. I cry for my children, because I know how much they'll miss their dear lolo, who was their constant companion. I cry for my mother-in-law, thinking how painful it is to lose the love of your life. I cry for my husband, especially when he tells me he misses his Dad. And finally, I cry thinking how he made a big difference in my life, and my children's lives.

Dad, we may have not exchanged a lot of words during the 12 years we spent together, but know that in exchange of millions of words, I am shedding tears for you...tears to tell you how much you are loved, missed, and how much I am thankful for all the support and understanding you have given to me and Jerome through the years. Thank you for being a loving lolo to my children, your apos. You are one of the most generous and kindest man I have ever met.

Let me end this post with a song especially dedicated for you. I know how much you loved Christmas songs, just like me (probably because we're both December babies). Every year, whenever September 1 comes, you start playing Christmas songs each morning, until Christmas day arrives. This is something we will greatly miss. Till we meet again, Dad...